If you were on your way down a busy street and saw the famous, almost iconic figure of the Elephant Man in his sweeping black cloak, hat and concealing mask, how would you react?
Would you:
a) cringe and look away
b) stare
c) hurry away
I think we might do all three if caught off guard. Joseph's disfigurements, due to a rare disorder called Proteus syndrome, were so severe that some women would actually faint at the sight of him (although we're talking Victorian times and corsets so tight they could hardly breathe. Fainting was fashionable.) Someone who looks as strange as the little Elephant Man did would make us all uncomfortable, perhaps even queasy.
Now imagine that a friend of yours asks you to meet his friend named Joseph, who has lived a life of loneliness, shunned by most of mankind and convinced he's a monster. Joseph is gentle, softspoken, loves to read poetry, and speaks about all kinds of interesting things. All you would have to do is shake his hand, smile, and say hello. Your friend says this will make an enormous difference in the young man's perception of himself.
So you muster your courage and go to Joseph's small basement apartment because you want to do your friend a favor. At the first sight of Joseph, you might gasp, avert your eyes or suddenly feel dizzy. He really does look awful. But then you look into his eyes and see a living, suffering human being. You realize he is terrified of what you're going to do or say.
You discover it's not as hard as you thought to take his hand and say "I'm pleased to meet you." And you mean it, because you can see the pain in his expressive brown eyes and you want to let him know you care.
That's exactly what a young woman named Leila Maturin did when Frederick Treves asked her to meet Joseph Merrick. Her warm smile and friendly greeting shocked him so much he dissolved into tears, unable to believe a woman had just touched his hand and looked into his eyes without screaming.
If we come face to face with someone whose appearance frightens us, whose disability embarrasses us, think of Leila Maturin's simple act. Her smile changed Merrick's life. After that day, he began to see himself as human, as someone who was worth knowing. At the end of his short life, he was surrounded by people who had discovered how lovable he was behind that strange mask.
If we take the time to see behind each other's masks, we might find the same.
Would you:
a) cringe and look away
b) stare
c) hurry away
I think we might do all three if caught off guard. Joseph's disfigurements, due to a rare disorder called Proteus syndrome, were so severe that some women would actually faint at the sight of him (although we're talking Victorian times and corsets so tight they could hardly breathe. Fainting was fashionable.) Someone who looks as strange as the little Elephant Man did would make us all uncomfortable, perhaps even queasy.
Now imagine that a friend of yours asks you to meet his friend named Joseph, who has lived a life of loneliness, shunned by most of mankind and convinced he's a monster. Joseph is gentle, softspoken, loves to read poetry, and speaks about all kinds of interesting things. All you would have to do is shake his hand, smile, and say hello. Your friend says this will make an enormous difference in the young man's perception of himself.
So you muster your courage and go to Joseph's small basement apartment because you want to do your friend a favor. At the first sight of Joseph, you might gasp, avert your eyes or suddenly feel dizzy. He really does look awful. But then you look into his eyes and see a living, suffering human being. You realize he is terrified of what you're going to do or say.
You discover it's not as hard as you thought to take his hand and say "I'm pleased to meet you." And you mean it, because you can see the pain in his expressive brown eyes and you want to let him know you care.
That's exactly what a young woman named Leila Maturin did when Frederick Treves asked her to meet Joseph Merrick. Her warm smile and friendly greeting shocked him so much he dissolved into tears, unable to believe a woman had just touched his hand and looked into his eyes without screaming.
If we come face to face with someone whose appearance frightens us, whose disability embarrasses us, think of Leila Maturin's simple act. Her smile changed Merrick's life. After that day, he began to see himself as human, as someone who was worth knowing. At the end of his short life, he was surrounded by people who had discovered how lovable he was behind that strange mask.
If we take the time to see behind each other's masks, we might find the same.
